


Nothing Can Capture A Heart Like A Melody Can

by Groovyviewbie



Series: I Feel Like I Win When I Lose [3]
Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: ABBA inspired, Cuddling, M/M, Pining, Rated T for language, Set during 6x07, Soft boys being soft, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:08:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26567086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Groovyviewbie/pseuds/Groovyviewbie
Summary: He knew Richard asked for him to hum but he couldn’t seem to help himself. It was old and familiar. Singing had been something to comfort him in his foster homes when none of the adults in his life would. It had been a safety blanket in the cold, dark storage container, left alone with a robot chauffer. It had been one of the few things he’d excelled in in his life and now he finally had an audience interested in his talent.Or: Jared comforts Richard the only way he knows how, with cuddles and singing.
Relationships: Jared Dunn/Richard Hendricks
Series: I Feel Like I Win When I Lose [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1924216
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Nothing Can Capture A Heart Like A Melody Can

**Author's Note:**

> Set between Richard yelling 'Fuck' at a billboard and Jared bringing him tea in his office during 6x07. Self editing strikes again so any mistakes are my own. Based on the song Thank You For the Music by ABBA.

Jared wasn’t sure how they ended up like this. On the roof, Richard curled into his lap as he worked his fingers through his shaggy curls. Things still weren’t perfect between the two of them, but it was nice to have him so close. He knew Richard had been awake for hours, scribbling on a whiteboard wall, the remnants of his piper costume strung about the office. The fumes of Tres Comas clinging to the fibres of his messily unbuttoned shirt. Jared had felt guilt at the party when he’d left Richard. Something hadn’t been right with Richard after his conversation with Monica. Jared hadn’t been able to shake the feeling something was wrong, but he was too busy keeping drinks topped up, making sure everyone was having a good time to truly tend to Richard’s needs.

When he’d shown up early the next morning to clean for the janitorial staff, he knew that it had been for the best that he didn’t mother Richard the night before. Richard was panicking enough without help from Jared. Leaving him to ruminate overnight meant he was much more articulate than the manic scratches around the office the next morning. Even if Jared didn’t fully understand the literal writing on the walls or Gilfoyle’s technical explanation, he knew this was bad. Even if Richard believed they could fix it, Gilfoyle had been right. All he felt was abject terror. Just not necessarily at the prospect of their algorithm bringing on the Techpocalypse. It was more abject terror at the prospect of losing this, the most functional home he'd ever been a part of.

Richard had been missing for a while when Jared finally followed him to the roof. Their talk had been enlightening for both of them. The opportunity to let Richard see the stakes, to truly understand them, was much needed. With none of his usual blind affirmation of Richard’s genius. Richard had talked and Jared had interjected when needed, mostly just listening as he talked himself around to the inevitable. They had to fail, and miserably at that.

Which is how they both found themselves in the precarious position they were currently in. Alone on the roof. Jared’s long fingers working against Richard’s scalp as he muttered to himself, trying to find the perfect words for his justification to the rest of the team.Unconsciously Jared began to hum to himself. A lullaby that one of his foster mothers would sing to him, a brief light memory in his darkened past. 

It was oddly sincere in their moment of panic. A moment for just them as Richard began to relax into Jared’s touch, taking a selfish moment for themselves. Richard knew he’d been selfish along the way, always convincing himself it was in Pied Pipers best interest as he fucked over his friends. From back alley meetings in Mexican restaurants with Gavin Belson, to complete asshole temper tantrums over Jared's rational morality. Even now, he felt like he was selfishly draining the little energy Jared had left, all in his own self interest and ego. What he'd convinced himself was in the interest of the company, in the baby he’d been nurturing from birth. The baby that they were about to throw out into a pack of wild wolves, watch on as it was torn limb from limb. Something Richard imagined had probably almost happened to Jared in his tempestuous past.

“Richard?” Jared’s voice broke through the quiet, Richard instantly missing the smooth vibrations from his humming. “I know now is probably not the best time, since I left for Gwart. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting me remain by your side. I know I’m not the easiest person to work beside. I’m not a genius like you, or proficient in good natured ribbing like Dinesh and Gilfoyle, nowhere near as ruthless in business as Monica. Like so many people have told me before, I’m not special. So, thank you Richard. Thank you for letting me be a part of this.” Jared whispered softly.

Jared had the look of the lost baby deer as Richard’s eyes met his. The nervous laugh Richard let out surprised them both, but Jared knew not to let it sting. Just one of his usual nervous reactions. Surely he didn’t actually find his uselessness amusing, hadn't kept him on all of these years as a cruel joke, or even worse, kept him as a victory prize to hang over Gavin Belson's head. A horrible thought struck Jared as he saw the cogs turning in Richard’s head, watched him piece together what he could only assume was going to be a verbal lashing. He couldn't watch but also couldn't look away. He was helplessly devoted to Richard, even as he prepared for the inevitable.

“You shouldn’t thank me Jared. We fucked up. No no we didn’t. I did. Gilfoyle and Dinesh did too I guess with their code. You did everything right. I wasted years of your life with this and now it’s all fucked because I had to be the smartest guy in the fucking room.” Richard closed his eyes as he spoke, trying to concentrate on his thought process so he didn’t put his foot in his mouth. Jared’s sad puppy eyes were already burned into his brain, he didn’t need to be responsible for making things worse. “You could’ve stayed at Hooli. Or worked for someone who wasn’t a complete asshole. You should be mad at me. Hey maybe you should shoot me again.” Richard cringed as he felt Jared tense up. Great, it took ten seconds for him to say the wrong thing, just like he knew he would. “Or maybe, no you know what. Thanks Jared. We couldn’t do this without you. And not in the super cheesy way you’d say about like your parents or whatever in an acceptance speech or to your teachers after finals, even though you taught yourself most of the syllabus. I really mean it. I- you’re more than our COO, you’re my, my uh- you’re my best friend man. You deserve better but I guess you got me.” Richard let out a little laugh, hoping he’d eased the tension with his stumbled words and rambling tangents.

Jared forced his eyes away, focusing instead on the billboard. She really was a thing of beauty. Even through unshed tears. He wished they had more time. Wished that this wasn’t coming to an end in just a few hours. Even if nobody would admit it, or would prioritise it in their assessment of the situation, without Pied Piper, what did they have keeping them together? They'd been pulled together by circumstance. They'd tried talking about guy stuff, tried to remain friends after Richard branched off to build Pipernet alone, but it had just ended up in awkward glances and empty words across the kitchen island. Their relationship was unsustainable.

In another life this would be a happy occasion. Richard in his lap, finally allowing exhaustion to take over after years of hard work and stress. Jared would let his hands roam lower than Richard’s scalp, would lean down to place gentle kisses up and down every inch of his exposed skin until it was time to return to work. All under the glow of Richard’s hard work. They would make plans for dinner. Later that night Jared would nervously get down on one knee, hands shaking as he produced the ring box, finally fully commit to the man he loved. They would fight at work over the smallest details and make up at home, tangled up together on the couch. Eventually they would adopt. Their house would be a home, a safe haven, filled with joy. The very place he'd longed for growing up in the system. Jared would cook at night, Richard awkwardly watching on from the side, offering help even though he knew he was hopeless at anything that wasn't instant and noodles. Jared would hum to himself when he thought Richard was distracted but he'd always have a knack for catching him when he least expected it, full of surprises even after all those years. 

Only this wasn’t that world. It was another one of Jared's fantasies that got out of hand. Like Harriet Tubman in his childhood bedroom or Ed Chambers eating his lunch. Instead of a calm and collected, albeit nervous, Richard in his arms, he had the neurotic, anxiety ridden man he knew and secretly loved, stumbling over a half apology that Jared couldn’t respond to. How could he fully express that he hadn’t wasted the prime of his life? That he couldn’t ever consider this a waste because he gained all of this. He had Richard in his life and wasn’t that more than enough? Even if he could find the words, he was worried that saying them would end in that glazed over, disconnected look. The I love you would go unreciprocated and he would lose Richard forever despite his best efforts.

“Hey Jared, you still in there buddy?” Richard sat up ever so slightly, squinting up at him. He followed his eyes to the billboard, sighing slightly as he fell right back into Jared’s lap, eyes scrunching together once more. The billboard was a horrifying reminder of the large weight that would loom forever on his chest. The weight that he’d all but forgotten about curled up in Jared’s lap. Weird. That was probably one of those feelings he should bury deep down. File it away in the recesses of his mind alongside his underlying anger issues and the memory of kissing Jimmy Jones by the lake at Math camp when he was 14.

“Oh sorry Richard. I was just lost in thought. We should probably get back to the coal face. Not to talk out of place but the Piper costume has a rather pungent odour of alcohol. I laid out your spare clothes on your desk, and there’s wet wipes in your top drawer.” Jared spoke with his usual demeanour, as if nervous of stepping out of place. He was right of course but Richard couldn't find the fight in him to face it down there. Jared could sense Richards nerves bubble again under the surface, letting his fingers return to Richard’s scalp as if on instinct, trying to soothe the oncoming panic attack before it had a chance to hit. “I could make you tea while you relay to the boys, and Monica of course, what you plan to do. I know you probably didn’t get much sleep last night, hopefully the tea will help.”

“That sounds yeah Jared. I know we need to go back but could we… I just- Can we…?” Richard sighed as he stumbled over his words, hating how he couldn’t just be forthright. How was it so hard to finish a thought? His hand scrubbed over his face, trying to erase the first attempt to form coherent thought, and started again. “I just, I like this. When you were humming. It made me forget the shitstorm coming. You have a nice voice. Or like I like it. I know Pied Piper started as a music app but I'm not exactly, I never really had an ear for- I'm just trying to say I guess... Five more minutes okay?"

Jared could feel the blush creeping up his neck at the compliment, nodding almost immediately. He racked his brain for the appropriate song, the lullaby seeming too flippant and unimportant for a moment like this. He needed something to inspire hope for the future, to remind Richard he wasn't alone in his next steps. That despite everything, Jared was always there for him. It wasn’t long before he remembered his arrangement of Somewhere Over the Rainbow. The one time in his collegiate acapella career where he’d been honoured with lead vocals, despite his many protests. He let the words pass his lips, switching effortlessly between singing and humming, hoping it was good enough, that he was good enough. 

He knew Richard asked for him to hum but he couldn’t seem to help himself. It was old and familiar. Singing had been something to comfort him in his foster homes when none of the adults in his life would. It had been a safety blanket in the cold, dark storage container, left alone with a robot chauffer. It had been one of the few things he’d excelled in in his life and now he finally had an audience interested in his talent. Not taking advantage of his knowledge or using his skills to get ahead. Just his friend, captivated in his performance, worries melting like lemon drops. Alone on the roof, looking out on the valley. The worries would resurface in only a moments time. It was their natural state after all. For now though they had this, and Jared thanked whoever had been watching over him for giving him this moment in time.

**Author's Note:**

> Quick thank you to everyone who has read this series so far and left kudos, I was really nervous about posting these so for people to like them it means a lot. I have two more stories in this series partially written and four more mapped out because I'm too impatient to finish a collection before posting.


End file.
